Oct. 24th, 2011 04:47 pm
Outtakes: These Four Kings
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fox_confessorHiya
So, I have two very messy outtakes that I've cut from the story but I do hate to just delete things.
The first is from Peter's POV in seventh year and he's awfully bitter and mean here, I think, a bit too mean to come into the story proper but I didn't want to toss it out completely. It also kind of explains where a character came in from year 7 chapter 7.
Seventh year wasn't like how Peter had expected but then nothing ever was. He'd had Mary and she was lovely, but she wouldn't do anything except talk about weddings in these breathy, awed tones. She had her robes picked out, and knew what kind of flowers and the cake. She'd been planning for that moment since she was a little girl, she'd say, and sometimes Peter would find her gazing at James for long moments before sighing and settling back against Peter's side. And that's what it would feel like: settling. She was settling for him because his friends were completely out of her reach.
He broke up with her as gently as he could, which wasn't very. He hadn't had any practice with that sort of thing, and neither had James, so he'd asked Sirius, who didn't really care at all when he dumped someone. Just do it, he'd said, and Peter had. Mary had cried as if Peter had broken her heart, and for a moment he'd thought maybe he had. He knew he should have asked Remus because at least Remus and Sabine were still friends.
Finding another girl to date was easier the second time. It happened in the five minutes that Remus was dating Astrid Flint, and she wanted Remus to find someone for her younger by a year sister, Marit. Marit, it turned out, wasn't interested in being married at all. She had a plan, she said--a destiny--and it didn't involve being tied down to one Wizard but she didn't mind being with Peter for now. They didn't talk much, which Peter preferred, because Marit said things that Peter knew James wouldn't approve of, and he supposed he shouldn't either but she said them in such a matter of fact way in between letting Peter slide his hand beneath her skirt that he didn't argue when she would call Lily a mudblood, Remus a half-breed, or Sirius and James blood traitors. It's not like Peter thought those things, not about his friends, but it was common enough, he knew, and sometimes he didn't see what was so wrong in them (though not mudblood because that was really just like a curse, and James wasn't a traitor, not like how she meant it).
It did mean, however, that he didn't bring her around to have lunch, which he didn't think was much fair, but better than starting a war. Besides, he could see her where she sat at the Slytherin table with her own friends and everyone knew they were dating, which was the important part. She wasn't as pretty as her sister, though she was excellent at charms that made her hair thick and shiny and her skin clear, which Peter found out completely by accident. Knowing what she really looked like didn't stop Peter from wanting to date her, especially since no one was too concerned with finding him someone better, not like they were with Remus, and Peter couldn't figure that at all.
(end)
This second one was going to come onto the end of chapter 7 that I just posted. It's what happens when Remus and Sirius went up to the room. I just cut it because the chapter was already pretty long and this doesn't seem to particularly add to the story but I like it (and I hate deleting things completely :). This is even rougher than the one above (as you'll see my complicated relationship to verb tenses) and shows what things look like in my draft so I should probably be embarrassed by that but *hands*
***
Remus crawled into bed wearing flannel bottoms and one of James' old long sleeve t shirts. He pulled the blankets up to his chin only to have Sirius, stripped down to his boxers, twitch them back down again and sat on the edge of the bed.
"Let me see your leg."
"Tired."
"I know you are." Sirius helped Remus turn over onto his back, and pulled up the leg of Remus' pajama bottoms to past his mid-thigh. He produced a small jar with a bit of a flourish, smiling and pulling it back when Remus reached for it. He twisted off the lid and the smell of peppermint filled the room.
"That smells nice."
"Yeah? It's strong but I followed the instructions precisely."
"What is it?" Remus asked.
"A potion I found in one of Pomfrey's books," Sirius said as he dipped two fingers into the jar before setting it aside, and working the thick cream into Remus' knee. "It's supposed to increase blood flow and ease the ache. Does it feel good?"
"Yeah."
Sirius finished, pulled Remus' trouser leg down, and covered him back up. He chafed his hands together then massaged his thumbs against Remus' temples, watching--pleased--as Remus' eyes fell shut. After a bit, Sirius put the lights out and laid down with Remus, pulling him close to rub his neck and shoulders. He only felt slightly guilty for enjoying the contact with a nearly asleep Remus as much as he did. It was easy to justify that this was all for Remus, especially as Remus settled against him.
Sirius was nearly asleep as well when the light came on suddenly, flooding the room with light. He felt Remus startle in his arms before curling away, burying his face into the pillows. Sirius reached for his wand, finding Remus' instead, and took aim to lower the lights. He knew it must be Peter and James, and began berating them both before he'd managed to either kick the blankets from his legs or dim the lights once more.
Pushing back the curtains on Remus' bed, Sirius saw that Peter had come in alone. His mouth was fixed in an "O" of surprise as he looked at the wand Sirius held pointed in his direction. He gave a funny high pitched yell as he threw his hands up into the air as if to protect himself, sending the contents of his book bag flying. As it landed, an alarm sounded like an old fashioned air raid horn, the kind they'd learned about in Muggle studies, the sound ricocheting off the stone walls. A small ball flew out of Peter's bag and zinged around the room, and Sirius remembered--this was Peter's idea of a joke, a modified Zonk's Guaranteed to Wake the Dead alarm clock, which hadn't been nearly as loud or as fast before Peter got hold of it. He'd planned to set it off in the Slytherin common room when he got the chance, Sirius supposed that would be after Marit dumped him and not before.
Sirius finally kicked free of the covers and tumbled out of the bed, yelling at Peter the entire time, though he couldn't be heard over the sound of the alarm. He tried to blast the thing but it fly around so fast, zipping beneath the beds and bouncing off the ceiling, that Sirius couldn't manage a clear shot with a borrowed wand. He was afraid of hitting Remus as well where he stood in the middle of the room with his head down, eyes squeezed shut, and hands clamped down tight over his ears, wincing in pain.
James ran in a moment later, ducking to miss another shot from Sirius, who was still roaring with rage at Peter. Sirius tried again as it rolled between Peter's feet, and Peter, still afraid of a hex, transformed into a rat just as Professor McGonagall rushed in, brought by the noise that likely shook the entire castle.
"Sirius Black!" She thundered just as James sent a spell to force Wormtail back into Peter, who ran out of the room and disappeared out of sight. James and Sirius then managed to blast the alarm together, the silence so sudden and complete as to be nearly as stunning as the alarm had been. "Mr. Black! We do not transform fellow students into rats."
"Professor," James began, stepping between Sirius and the professor with his hands spread wide.
Sirius ignored them both, the look on his face still murderous as he brushed past James to get to Remus. He took Remus' head between his hands to search his face before he pulled Remus close to rest his forehead on Sirius' shoulder, whispering to him that it was all right, that he'd be all right. He heard Professor McGonagall sigh heavily behind him.
"James, clear the halls, if you would, and check on Mr. Pettigrew," she said, her voice sounding weary, as if the last year for the marauders couldn't end quickly enough. James met Sirius' eyes and put his hand on Remus' shoulder, waited a beat until Sirius nodded that they were both fine before he left the room.
"Mr. Lupin," Professor McGonagall said once they were alone. The tone of her voice clearly sounded as though she expected him, as the usual lone voice of reason, to explain. As she turned from the smoldering remains of the alarm, however, she finally saw that Remus was in distress. Crossing the room, she put her hand on his shoulder as James had. "Remus," she said more gently.
"Hurts," Remus answered, unable to say more.
Sirius pulled Remus' hands from over his ears and lifted his head to look more carefully into his eyes. "What hurts?" he asked, searching Remus for injury and half expecting to find some new cut or bruise.
"My head." Remus pushed Sirius' hands away and buried his face back into Sirius' neck. He squeezed his eyes tightly as if to shut out the light and wrapped his arms around Sirius' waist, holding on tightly.
"He wasn't feeling well earlier," Sirius explained to Professor McGonagall in clipped tones, hating to explain even to her. He rubbed his hands over Remus' back, shoulders, his neck, attempting to soothe Remus again. "The noise. In the days before--"
"I understand," she said, though Sirius privately believed that she couldn't possibly begin to understand. "Please put some clothes on, Mr. Black, and we'll take him to the infirmary."
"No," Remus whispered against Sirius' neck. "I want to stay here. I just want to go to bed."
"Please, Professor, he doesn't like to go there."
"I can well understand that, Mr. Black, but if he's ill."
"I'm all right," Remus said, struggling to stand on his own before Sirius pulled him back into his arms.
"He'll be all right," Sirius said to Professor McGonagall, pleading. "I'll take care of him."
"I think it's best if--"
Remus slumped against Sirius in defeat but Sirius only pulled him closer. "He has to be there so much. It's not fair."
"It's not a matter of fairness, Sirius," Professor McGonagall began, though far more gentler than before. "If Remus is ill--"
"I'm all--"
"Clearly not," Professor McGonagall bit out crisply. She put her hand on his forehead, looking into his eyes for a long moment before she sighed heavily again. She surprised them both when she crossed the room to look out into the hall. "Mr. Potter," she called, and in a moment James stuck his head back into the room. "Would you please go to the infirmary and ask Madame Pomfrey for a sleeping draught."
"I don't want--"
"It's either that or the infirmary, Mr. Lupin."
"He'll take it," Sirius said, sliding his hand back up Remus' spine to ease his head back on Sirius' shoulder.
"And you, Mr. Black. I'll expect you in my office first thing in the morning so that we may discuss your punishment. We absolutely do not use transfiguration against fellow students."
"Yes, ma'am."
"The draught should help as will silence, but keep a close eye on him and take him to Madame Pomfrey if he worsens during the night or if he's not better in the morning."
"Yes, ma'am. "
She left them alone then, closing the door behind her. Sirius and Remus stood still for a few minutes in the quiet before Sirius began to ease Remus back toward his bed. "Are you truly all right?"
"My head hurts."
"I know. Is your knee all right? You didn't hurt it again, did you?"
"No, it's better with the stuff. Better."
Sirius nodded, and helped Remus climb back onto his bed where he curled up onto his side around his pillow. James came in a moment later carrying the draught. "Help him sit up, Padfoot."
"I don't need it, Prongs," Remus protested, and clutched at his pillow even tighter.
"You'll be better with it."
"I hate taking them."
"It'll help you sleep." James nodded at Sirius to help, and Sirius sat at the edge of the bed, his hands light on Remus' back.
"They make me feel like I'm not connected, as if I could float away. I hate it."
"We'll be right here. We'll tie a tether around your ankle. If you go up, you'll take us with you," James whispered. "C'mon then. Help him up, Sirius."
Sirius finally helped Remus sit up and James put the goblet to Remus' lips. Once it was gone, Sirius leaned back against the pillows and pulled Remus into his arms once more. Remus settled against him, his head Sirius' chest, and Sirius massaged his neck, the back of his head. James sat with them, rubbing gentle circles over Remus' back until Remus finally fell asleep.
"Keep Peter well away from me tomorrow," Sirius whispered after a while , and James only just nodded. "And make sure he's at the Whomping Willow when I get out of detention."
"He will be."
Sirius traced his fingertips over the faded scars on Remus' face, wanting to say more but biting it all back.
"He'll be okay," James said.
Sirius breathed out heavily, thankful that James knew him so well. "I wish I could make all of it go away."
"What do you mean?"
"Make it so he's never in pain again. Find a cure. I still look sometimes," he admitted, not daring to look at James. "That's really why I got detention. Slughorn has this book--"
"There's no cure, Sirius."
"I know that, James, I just--"
"No, Sirius, listen to me. There's no cure. You know what he went through with his parents. You can't do that to him."
"I'm not. I won't. I haven't said anything to him," Sirius said quickly and quietly when Remus shifted in his arms. He waited until he was sure that Remus was still asleep before he spoke again. "I don't like the way Peter talks to him sometimes."
"I'll talk to him."
"And it bothers me that he's dating a Slytherin."
"You can't expect--"
"I know. I just don't want him to bring her around Remus anymore. He's had enough and that is something I can control."
"Sirius--"
"Don't start on me, James. They've not been too kind to Evans, either."
James couldn't respond to that, Sirius knew, and he only just nodded before he stretched out onto the bed next to Remus. "I'll talk to Peter," he said again, putting his arm over them both.
So, I have two very messy outtakes that I've cut from the story but I do hate to just delete things.
The first is from Peter's POV in seventh year and he's awfully bitter and mean here, I think, a bit too mean to come into the story proper but I didn't want to toss it out completely. It also kind of explains where a character came in from year 7 chapter 7.
Seventh year wasn't like how Peter had expected but then nothing ever was. He'd had Mary and she was lovely, but she wouldn't do anything except talk about weddings in these breathy, awed tones. She had her robes picked out, and knew what kind of flowers and the cake. She'd been planning for that moment since she was a little girl, she'd say, and sometimes Peter would find her gazing at James for long moments before sighing and settling back against Peter's side. And that's what it would feel like: settling. She was settling for him because his friends were completely out of her reach.
He broke up with her as gently as he could, which wasn't very. He hadn't had any practice with that sort of thing, and neither had James, so he'd asked Sirius, who didn't really care at all when he dumped someone. Just do it, he'd said, and Peter had. Mary had cried as if Peter had broken her heart, and for a moment he'd thought maybe he had. He knew he should have asked Remus because at least Remus and Sabine were still friends.
Finding another girl to date was easier the second time. It happened in the five minutes that Remus was dating Astrid Flint, and she wanted Remus to find someone for her younger by a year sister, Marit. Marit, it turned out, wasn't interested in being married at all. She had a plan, she said--a destiny--and it didn't involve being tied down to one Wizard but she didn't mind being with Peter for now. They didn't talk much, which Peter preferred, because Marit said things that Peter knew James wouldn't approve of, and he supposed he shouldn't either but she said them in such a matter of fact way in between letting Peter slide his hand beneath her skirt that he didn't argue when she would call Lily a mudblood, Remus a half-breed, or Sirius and James blood traitors. It's not like Peter thought those things, not about his friends, but it was common enough, he knew, and sometimes he didn't see what was so wrong in them (though not mudblood because that was really just like a curse, and James wasn't a traitor, not like how she meant it).
It did mean, however, that he didn't bring her around to have lunch, which he didn't think was much fair, but better than starting a war. Besides, he could see her where she sat at the Slytherin table with her own friends and everyone knew they were dating, which was the important part. She wasn't as pretty as her sister, though she was excellent at charms that made her hair thick and shiny and her skin clear, which Peter found out completely by accident. Knowing what she really looked like didn't stop Peter from wanting to date her, especially since no one was too concerned with finding him someone better, not like they were with Remus, and Peter couldn't figure that at all.
(end)
This second one was going to come onto the end of chapter 7 that I just posted. It's what happens when Remus and Sirius went up to the room. I just cut it because the chapter was already pretty long and this doesn't seem to particularly add to the story but I like it (and I hate deleting things completely :). This is even rougher than the one above (as you'll see my complicated relationship to verb tenses) and shows what things look like in my draft so I should probably be embarrassed by that but *hands*
***
Remus crawled into bed wearing flannel bottoms and one of James' old long sleeve t shirts. He pulled the blankets up to his chin only to have Sirius, stripped down to his boxers, twitch them back down again and sat on the edge of the bed.
"Let me see your leg."
"Tired."
"I know you are." Sirius helped Remus turn over onto his back, and pulled up the leg of Remus' pajama bottoms to past his mid-thigh. He produced a small jar with a bit of a flourish, smiling and pulling it back when Remus reached for it. He twisted off the lid and the smell of peppermint filled the room.
"That smells nice."
"Yeah? It's strong but I followed the instructions precisely."
"What is it?" Remus asked.
"A potion I found in one of Pomfrey's books," Sirius said as he dipped two fingers into the jar before setting it aside, and working the thick cream into Remus' knee. "It's supposed to increase blood flow and ease the ache. Does it feel good?"
"Yeah."
Sirius finished, pulled Remus' trouser leg down, and covered him back up. He chafed his hands together then massaged his thumbs against Remus' temples, watching--pleased--as Remus' eyes fell shut. After a bit, Sirius put the lights out and laid down with Remus, pulling him close to rub his neck and shoulders. He only felt slightly guilty for enjoying the contact with a nearly asleep Remus as much as he did. It was easy to justify that this was all for Remus, especially as Remus settled against him.
Sirius was nearly asleep as well when the light came on suddenly, flooding the room with light. He felt Remus startle in his arms before curling away, burying his face into the pillows. Sirius reached for his wand, finding Remus' instead, and took aim to lower the lights. He knew it must be Peter and James, and began berating them both before he'd managed to either kick the blankets from his legs or dim the lights once more.
Pushing back the curtains on Remus' bed, Sirius saw that Peter had come in alone. His mouth was fixed in an "O" of surprise as he looked at the wand Sirius held pointed in his direction. He gave a funny high pitched yell as he threw his hands up into the air as if to protect himself, sending the contents of his book bag flying. As it landed, an alarm sounded like an old fashioned air raid horn, the kind they'd learned about in Muggle studies, the sound ricocheting off the stone walls. A small ball flew out of Peter's bag and zinged around the room, and Sirius remembered--this was Peter's idea of a joke, a modified Zonk's Guaranteed to Wake the Dead alarm clock, which hadn't been nearly as loud or as fast before Peter got hold of it. He'd planned to set it off in the Slytherin common room when he got the chance, Sirius supposed that would be after Marit dumped him and not before.
Sirius finally kicked free of the covers and tumbled out of the bed, yelling at Peter the entire time, though he couldn't be heard over the sound of the alarm. He tried to blast the thing but it fly around so fast, zipping beneath the beds and bouncing off the ceiling, that Sirius couldn't manage a clear shot with a borrowed wand. He was afraid of hitting Remus as well where he stood in the middle of the room with his head down, eyes squeezed shut, and hands clamped down tight over his ears, wincing in pain.
James ran in a moment later, ducking to miss another shot from Sirius, who was still roaring with rage at Peter. Sirius tried again as it rolled between Peter's feet, and Peter, still afraid of a hex, transformed into a rat just as Professor McGonagall rushed in, brought by the noise that likely shook the entire castle.
"Sirius Black!" She thundered just as James sent a spell to force Wormtail back into Peter, who ran out of the room and disappeared out of sight. James and Sirius then managed to blast the alarm together, the silence so sudden and complete as to be nearly as stunning as the alarm had been. "Mr. Black! We do not transform fellow students into rats."
"Professor," James began, stepping between Sirius and the professor with his hands spread wide.
Sirius ignored them both, the look on his face still murderous as he brushed past James to get to Remus. He took Remus' head between his hands to search his face before he pulled Remus close to rest his forehead on Sirius' shoulder, whispering to him that it was all right, that he'd be all right. He heard Professor McGonagall sigh heavily behind him.
"James, clear the halls, if you would, and check on Mr. Pettigrew," she said, her voice sounding weary, as if the last year for the marauders couldn't end quickly enough. James met Sirius' eyes and put his hand on Remus' shoulder, waited a beat until Sirius nodded that they were both fine before he left the room.
"Mr. Lupin," Professor McGonagall said once they were alone. The tone of her voice clearly sounded as though she expected him, as the usual lone voice of reason, to explain. As she turned from the smoldering remains of the alarm, however, she finally saw that Remus was in distress. Crossing the room, she put her hand on his shoulder as James had. "Remus," she said more gently.
"Hurts," Remus answered, unable to say more.
Sirius pulled Remus' hands from over his ears and lifted his head to look more carefully into his eyes. "What hurts?" he asked, searching Remus for injury and half expecting to find some new cut or bruise.
"My head." Remus pushed Sirius' hands away and buried his face back into Sirius' neck. He squeezed his eyes tightly as if to shut out the light and wrapped his arms around Sirius' waist, holding on tightly.
"He wasn't feeling well earlier," Sirius explained to Professor McGonagall in clipped tones, hating to explain even to her. He rubbed his hands over Remus' back, shoulders, his neck, attempting to soothe Remus again. "The noise. In the days before--"
"I understand," she said, though Sirius privately believed that she couldn't possibly begin to understand. "Please put some clothes on, Mr. Black, and we'll take him to the infirmary."
"No," Remus whispered against Sirius' neck. "I want to stay here. I just want to go to bed."
"Please, Professor, he doesn't like to go there."
"I can well understand that, Mr. Black, but if he's ill."
"I'm all right," Remus said, struggling to stand on his own before Sirius pulled him back into his arms.
"He'll be all right," Sirius said to Professor McGonagall, pleading. "I'll take care of him."
"I think it's best if--"
Remus slumped against Sirius in defeat but Sirius only pulled him closer. "He has to be there so much. It's not fair."
"It's not a matter of fairness, Sirius," Professor McGonagall began, though far more gentler than before. "If Remus is ill--"
"I'm all--"
"Clearly not," Professor McGonagall bit out crisply. She put her hand on his forehead, looking into his eyes for a long moment before she sighed heavily again. She surprised them both when she crossed the room to look out into the hall. "Mr. Potter," she called, and in a moment James stuck his head back into the room. "Would you please go to the infirmary and ask Madame Pomfrey for a sleeping draught."
"I don't want--"
"It's either that or the infirmary, Mr. Lupin."
"He'll take it," Sirius said, sliding his hand back up Remus' spine to ease his head back on Sirius' shoulder.
"And you, Mr. Black. I'll expect you in my office first thing in the morning so that we may discuss your punishment. We absolutely do not use transfiguration against fellow students."
"Yes, ma'am."
"The draught should help as will silence, but keep a close eye on him and take him to Madame Pomfrey if he worsens during the night or if he's not better in the morning."
"Yes, ma'am. "
She left them alone then, closing the door behind her. Sirius and Remus stood still for a few minutes in the quiet before Sirius began to ease Remus back toward his bed. "Are you truly all right?"
"My head hurts."
"I know. Is your knee all right? You didn't hurt it again, did you?"
"No, it's better with the stuff. Better."
Sirius nodded, and helped Remus climb back onto his bed where he curled up onto his side around his pillow. James came in a moment later carrying the draught. "Help him sit up, Padfoot."
"I don't need it, Prongs," Remus protested, and clutched at his pillow even tighter.
"You'll be better with it."
"I hate taking them."
"It'll help you sleep." James nodded at Sirius to help, and Sirius sat at the edge of the bed, his hands light on Remus' back.
"They make me feel like I'm not connected, as if I could float away. I hate it."
"We'll be right here. We'll tie a tether around your ankle. If you go up, you'll take us with you," James whispered. "C'mon then. Help him up, Sirius."
Sirius finally helped Remus sit up and James put the goblet to Remus' lips. Once it was gone, Sirius leaned back against the pillows and pulled Remus into his arms once more. Remus settled against him, his head Sirius' chest, and Sirius massaged his neck, the back of his head. James sat with them, rubbing gentle circles over Remus' back until Remus finally fell asleep.
"Keep Peter well away from me tomorrow," Sirius whispered after a while , and James only just nodded. "And make sure he's at the Whomping Willow when I get out of detention."
"He will be."
Sirius traced his fingertips over the faded scars on Remus' face, wanting to say more but biting it all back.
"He'll be okay," James said.
Sirius breathed out heavily, thankful that James knew him so well. "I wish I could make all of it go away."
"What do you mean?"
"Make it so he's never in pain again. Find a cure. I still look sometimes," he admitted, not daring to look at James. "That's really why I got detention. Slughorn has this book--"
"There's no cure, Sirius."
"I know that, James, I just--"
"No, Sirius, listen to me. There's no cure. You know what he went through with his parents. You can't do that to him."
"I'm not. I won't. I haven't said anything to him," Sirius said quickly and quietly when Remus shifted in his arms. He waited until he was sure that Remus was still asleep before he spoke again. "I don't like the way Peter talks to him sometimes."
"I'll talk to him."
"And it bothers me that he's dating a Slytherin."
"You can't expect--"
"I know. I just don't want him to bring her around Remus anymore. He's had enough and that is something I can control."
"Sirius--"
"Don't start on me, James. They've not been too kind to Evans, either."
James couldn't respond to that, Sirius knew, and he only just nodded before he stretched out onto the bed next to Remus. "I'll talk to Peter," he said again, putting his arm over them both.
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And OH. FUCKING HELL, PETER. I WOULD FUCKING DESTROY YOU FOR DOING WHAT YOU DID IN THIS SECOND BIT. OH MY GOSH. SIRIUS HAS EVERY RIGHT TO HEX YOUR BALLS BLUE, YOU USELESS, USELESS BOY. GRRRRRR.
Probably best you did leave that bit out. Since I'm already pretty much DONE with Peter and his almost-evil ways, this last bit would have just pushed me over the edge. (And lullllz at your terrible verb tense changes and half-formed sentences XD)
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(I know right? In the beginning I wasn't sure if I wanted to work in past or present so it's all over the place, especially in the older things, and this second part was one of the first things I wrote, I think)
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Peter through it all I just want to shake him, or the others and say 'LOOK WHAT IS HAPPENING' but I guess it's like watching Titanic and going THERE'S AN ICEBERG, LETS AVOID THAT PLS.
I absolutely adore Sirius looking after Remus just before the full moon, the amount of tenderness he shows, especially when compared with how he treats Peter, just, arghhh.
It's all so good <3
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Sometimes I feel so, so sad for Peter even if he will be evil. As though the right amount of sympathy could've changed things. Because I know what's coming and how much I will cry. His actions are terrible and despicable but I find myself thinking that he will always have missed something the rest of them had, the real love that they experienced, however briefly.
Caring Sirius is adorable *melts*
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...I mean, I actually don't wish it to have happened any other way because then there wouldn't be any Harry Potter books to fall in love with and no fanfic to play with but you know what I mean :D
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I know this is a very long comment, but I had to get this out of my system. And I'm sorry if my English sucks, but I'm not a native speaker.
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These answers are only just how I think about the characters in this story--they certainly aren't canon (since I'm not JKR) but I have given it a lot of thought. I'm happy to talk characters, though. I know I haven't got it right every time (I know I contradict myself in places, too, as time goes on--I've been writing this for nearly two years) and I know that people see different motivations, which is one of the best things about fanfic--we all get to share what we see, what we love and hate. I'm glad that you've found something in These Four Kings to love and I really don't mind when people disagree with me or ask me questions.
Anyway: I don't think Peter's stupid but he knows there's value in people thinking he's stupid. Like before he even comes to Hogwarts, he manages to hide his magical ability from his mom because he has a plan. He's always thinking of how to best advance himself. He's not handsome like Sirius, he's not popular like James, and he's not nice like Remus so he has to use what he does have. He's skilled at hiding himself and so his friends never truly know him or his thoughts beyond what he shows them. Of course, they don't go looking deeper either. They're teenage boys, so they're wrapped up in themselves as well. Remus tries harder than the rest, I think, but he's so worried about what's going to happen in the future and what's happening with Sirius that he doesn't see what's going on with Peter. Sirius is wrapped up in Remus and James in Lily--they just don't see it and Peter never shows them. Once they leave Hogwarts, they become embroiled in the war and it's just one more thing.
Anyway, I love Sirius, too, but he has a lot of faults (actually, that's probably one of the reasons I love him). He's selfish, too, like Peter, but like you said, he wears his heart on his sleeve. He can't hide his emotions, so Peter knows that Sirius would never be friends with him if it wasn't for James, who, I think, honestly likes Peter (and is flattered by him).
These Four Kings won't go this far (I end it in the October after they've left Hogwarts because I don't really want to write the First War), in my mind, it's not so much that Sirius believes Peter is more reliable than Remus but that Sirius thinks that Remus is the spy and he's trying to find a way where he can protect everyone, even Remus. Sirius thinks that the only way that Remus can be the spy is if he's being offered something that is too hard to turn down: a cure for his lycanthropy. It makes Sirius pity him but he has to protect the Potters. Sirius loves Remus and he's afraid that one day Remus might get the location from Sirius or that Sirius might compromise the Potters in order to save Remus. It's an impossible position but he thinks that he can buy them all time by using someone he believes can't be the spy and that nobody would suspect as the secret-keeper: Peter.
I think that during the war, Remus changes--they all do. At first, James and Sirius get caught up in the excitement of a wizarding war--dueling and using powerful magic. Once Lily becomes pregnant, James begins to take it more seriously (how hard is it to avoid that word, yeah? aha) but Sirius has a reckless streak. He likes to duel--he doesn't like war and he doesn't like to kill but he likes the fight. Remus, on the other hand, becomes a true soldier. He understands before any of them the dangers and the horrors. He doesn't want to fight but does because he believes it's the right thing, even when he's asked to do things (like keep secrets from Sirius) because he understands.
Oh my goodness I'm rambling :D It's late and I've been rambling for a bit so let me know if I didn't answer what you asked.
Loves
Re: Loves
Ah...yes. year 4. It is my intention to go back and write it when I finish the story as a whole so that I can be complete but I didn't want to stop my momentum right now to do it.
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Why? Why don't you want to write about the first war? Your vision is so perfect! You nailed how they faced the war (and their own battles). I truly hope you change your mind.
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Take care of remus and peters attitude towsrds it all
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Thanks for reading!
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and i wish i had something better or different to say, but i'll just keep saying what i've been saying every time a new chapter goes up... i just love this story so dearly. it's my favourite.
i've always loved sirius but remus was always my dearest one, but your sirius is just so amazing... it's how i picture him now... and because of that i now love them equally.
the outtakes are great, i can see why you chose to leave them aside... but it's nice getting a chance to see whats happening 'backstage'.
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I'm glad you like the outtakes. It's hard to pick and choose what to show. Thanks so much for reading and for taking the time to comment. I really appreciate it.
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I love your peter POV. the beginning of his betrayal, subtle but so very effective.
AND so much cuteness and tenderness with sirius and remus. god your sirius is so so adorable, i love him.
Thankyou very much for this wonderful story and keep on writing!!
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