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fox_confessorSooooo, this isn't really how I thought I'd post this but then LJ doesn't really like my long posts (we'll see how it likes this length, I guess). Also, I'm in meetings through Thursday and could use a little something to look forward to each night, yeah? I mean, it'd be better for me if I got fic to read each night but unless someone is going to write up the little AU I have in my head... (it's actually an old one for ...uhm...in-my-head fic: AU where Sirius never went to Hogwarts, was forced to marry and had two boys (Sirius Arcturus (Arc) and Phineas (Phin)) and Remus comes to be their tutor after Sirius' wife and mother...actually, I never resolved what happen to them but they're gone leaving emotionally damaged children and Sirius for Remus to fix. I would, if you're wondering, read the shit out of that. But I digress.)
Anyway.
Title: These Four Kings (Summer 2/2 part a [I'll probably repost this all together and link to a community if you'd rather wait to read.])
Author: Dani (![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
escribo)
Word count: the whole thing is 8000+, this part about 2500+
Rating: PG-13
Pairings: Lily/James (in the future will be Remus/Sirius)
Timeline: August 1977
Disclaimer: All Harry Potter characters are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No copyright infringement is intended. I've not made nor seek any profit.
Year 1: one/ two/ three/ four/ five/ six/ seven
Year 2: one/ two/ three/ four
Year 3: one/ two/three/four
Year 4 (coming in the future when work quits eating my brains! Sorry for the out-of-order-ness)
Year 5 one/ two/ three/ four/ five/ six/ seven/ eight
Year 6 one/ two/ three/ four/ five/ six/ seven/ eight/ nine
Summer one
Arriving
Remus ducked his head and looked at his shoes as his mother began to cry when Mr. Potter came to collect him. She sat at the kitchen table, a ragged handkerchief clutched in her thin hand as her sister stood over her protectively, treating both Remus and Mr. Potter alternately as if they were invisible or part of a sideshow. He had to resist performing a bit of magic just to needle her that much more, though his wand was locked up tight in his school trunk at his mother's insistence. She hadn't wanted him to go amongst them, as she said, but Remus was determined. He pressed a kiss to her papery cheek, shouldered his bag, and followed Mr. Potter out into the overgrown garden. Before the pull of apparation took him, his last sight of the house was of his aunt and his mother standing at the door, his aunt's expression grim and his mother's frightened.
Remus stumbled as they landed in the field near the Potter's house, James' father catching him, steadying him with a hand to his elbow. Remus hated doing side along apparitions but had been afraid he'd splinch something if he tried it on his own. He hadn't dared it since he'd earned his license in May and he worried about the distance to James' house near Godric's Hollow, fretted that he wouldn't have the strength. Mr. Potter stood quietly at his side, seemingly mesmerized by a flock of starlings that rose up from the field and swooped low and around. He waited until Remus resettled the bag he carried on his shoulder and leaned a little less heavily on his cane. Only then did Mr. Potter smile and gently clap Remus on his back.
"All right, Remus?"
"Yeah, all right. Thank you, Mr. Potter, for--for coming to get me and all."
"My pleasure. The boys have talked about little else except your coming. They're likely still in bed, now, which is lucky for us. We'll be able to have a bite to eat before they clear the cupboards."
Remus followed Mr. Potter around to the back of the rambling house. He hadn't been since the summer before his father died when he'd come to stay for a week right after the summer holidays had started. Back then, Sirius' mother wouldn't let him come and it had just been James and Peter. This time they would all be together, though Peter couldn't come until the end of the week. Remus was nervous about the visit, about seeing James and Sirius again after everything, though he'd been relieved when the letters began to fly between them again, everything seeming to be back to normal.
Of course, James rarely owled unless he was issuing an edict, as he said, about plots and plans for when Remus would come and for the upcoming school year. Sirius, however, had become a constant and faithful correspondent, his letters reminding Remus so much of the times they'd spent together before everything had gone wrong that Remus found himself homesick for Sirius, and, strangely, his father, who had been a great letter writer as well. Remus had reread all of his father's letters and then began placing Sirius' alongside them in the small, rough hewed box he kept hidden in his school trunk so that his mother or aunt wouldn't find and destroy them. He couldn't bear the thought of either of them reading the words that meant so much to him, even though they didn't contain secrets or any great wisdom. Even just knowing what they brought, his mother hated seeing the owls, and would sigh and fret when she caught Remus tucking crusts of bread or bits of bacon into his pocket to give as treats. Remus, however, couldn't help the swoop of pleasure he felt in his stomach each time he saw Sirius' scruffy long eared owl tapping at his window, as different as he could manage from the stately eagle owls Mrs. Black forced Sirius to use when he'd been a boy.
The last letter Sirius had sent was tucked away unanswered in Remus' bag. Since their visit at the beginning of the summer, there'd been no mention of the things that had happened between them and Sirius had never again asked forgiveness--seeming to finally understand that he didn't need to, and Remus' thoughts had slowly found their homecoming in the things that had occupied him before. As he walked alongside Mr. Potter, Remus touched the mangled tin knight that he wore on a cord around his neck. He'd never asked Sirius why he took it, why he had worn it, or why he had given it back--what his sacrifice had really meant. He wondered if Sirius still thought about the kiss they'd shared, if he'd done it right, if they might do it again one day. He wanted to know if James knew, or Peter. He wanted to tell Sirius about Colin Edwards, and how it hadn't been the same as it had been with Sirius--that Colin seemed to be giving his best impression of a fish when he kiss. He wanted to ask Sirius if it felt like that when he'd kissed the girls he'd dated. He wanted so much that he didn't know where to begin and was afraid that he'd muck it up if he tried.
Those thoughts scattered when they found Mrs. Potter in the kitchen, and she rushed to hug and kiss him, rubbing at the smear of lipstick she left on his cheek. She held him out then with her hands on his shoulders, looking frankly at the barely healed scratches that still marred his face. They had long known about his lycanthropy, Remus' father trusting them with the secret prior to the first visit Remus ever made to Godric's Hollow, though Remus hadn't known until years later. He was glad for that now, and he didn't feel pitied by Mrs. Potter's regard when she cupped his face, and asked, "How are you feeling, dear?"
"Better, thank you, Mrs. Potter."
"I've told the boys that they're not to run helter skelter--" Her words were cut off by the sound of James thundering down the back stairs, jumping the last three to land in the kitchen. "James Potter! How many times have I told you to walk down those stairs?"
James flashed a toothy grin at his mother before he spotted Remus and gave a whoop of joy. "You're here early!"
James and his mother were both laughing by the time James knocked into Remus and hugged him tight. Remus couldn't help but smile and hug him back. He'd miss this, how carefree James was, how open. It shocked him how much he missed it, and he had to turn his face away before James saw it there.
"Dad said he wouldn't go until this afternoon."
"Now, we talked about this James," Mrs. Potter started but James interrupted her again.
"He's fine, mum. Tell mum you're fine," James said, still grinning but his hands had gone gentle as he eased Remus into a chair, bending to plant a kiss on the top of his head.
"I'm fine, Mrs. Potter. Really!" Remus promised dutifully in his best prefect's voice--the one that always got them out of trouble.
"See? I'm going to wake up Sirius. He'll be mad that he wasn't down first." With that, James grabbed Remus' bag where he'd dropped it on the floor and was off with a pop of apparition. A second later, they could hear him at the top of the stairs bellowing for Sirius and his mother sighed and laughed, shaking her head.
"Those boys," she said fondly as she buzzed around the kitchen, preparing breakfast. "You'll have to talk with them again Harold. I told them last week that Mrs. Lupin was worried they'd be too rowdy."
"It's really all right, Mrs. Potter. I like it. It's too quiet at my house," Remus said, and Mrs. Potter patted his shoulder.
"I'm surprised they're even up, what with working on the bike till all hours of the night. Sirius is determined to make it fly." Mr. Potter sat at the head of the breakfast table and smiled proudly though he was quick to frown seconds before Mrs. Potter turned to set a plate towering with pancakes onto the table.
"Don't you encourage him, Harold Potter. He'll break his neck."
"It's good for the boys, though they haven't even begun to work out all the charms they'd need. Not for lack of trying, of course." Mr. Potter looked suspiciously proud again, and Mrs. Potter swatted at him with her towel before she waved her wand to bring more bowls and pitchers to the table and began to pour coffee for both James' father and Remus.
Above their chatter and play fighting, Remus could hear James and another, softer foot fall on the stairs and knew it was Sirius. Remus concentrated on his coffee, adding milk and sugar, not quite ready to see him. Try as he might, though, he couldn't help glancing up as they came into the kitchen. James was dressed now and Sirius was trailing behind him, not quite awake but quick enough to nudge James away when he would sit next to Remus, taking the chair for himself. Remus ducked his head again, hiding his smile and taking extra care not tap his spoon against the edges of his cup as he stirred his coffee. Next to him, Sirius was pouring his own cup, his leg jiggling in a familiar nervous gesture, and Remus reached beneath the table to put his hand on Sirius' knee to stop it, also so familiar. Remus thought he must have done that a thousand times when they sat alongside each other in the Great Hall, though never in the last few months.
Sirius went still beneath his hand for a moment before he gave Remus a sidelong look, his eyes suddenly bright beneath his fringe, and smiled. Remus felt that light, swoopy feeling again, like making a spectacular dive on a broom, and smiled back.
That Night
Sirius could tell that Remus wasn't really asleep, just mostly, having long ago lost interest as James talked endlessly about Lily and Quidditch, once even wondering aloud if they thought that Lily would join the Quidditch team. Remus had laughed then, his eyes closed, and the smile hadn't left his lips as he lay still and quiet, curled around Sirius' pillow. Sirius sat next to him on the bed, with his back against the headboard and his long legs stretched out so that his hip brushed Remus' arm and his ankle touched Remus' knee. He couldn't stop looking at Remus through his long lashes as he pretended to read a magazine. He kept thinking about how his pillow was going to smell like Remus, and how nice Remus looked since he let his hair grow long enough that it was curling over his ears and at the nape of his neck.
Finally, James stood to go to his own room, stretching and yawning before he flicked his wand to turn off Sirius' record player. He stood for a minute with his hands on his hips, looking at Sirius but Sirius just flipped another page.
"Should we wake him, do you think?" James asked, lightly kicking the foot of the bed.
"Just leave him," Sirius whispered, trying hard to look as though he hadn't planned this all since after breakfast that morning when the Potters had put Remus in the guest room down from where James and Sirius' rooms were. Sirius had said nothing then but perched on the desk with his feet on the chair, watching as Remus carefully refolded and put away his clothes. There were two single beds, Peter would sleep in the other when he came at the end of the week. After a bit Sirius had said, you could have my room and then wondered why he'd said it aloud when Remus and James both turned to look at him as if he'd gone mad. The guest room was fine, a perfectly serviceable room. It had its own bath when Sirius had to share with James and his 101 potions to control his ridiculous hair. The room was fine, and yet Remus continued to stare at him, waiting for some explanation for this lunacy, Sirius was sure. None had been forthcoming. Sirius had only just shrugged his shoulders and looked away as James closed one eye and smooshed his mouth to the side to look at Sirius with what was his "suspicious" face.
Now, with James finally in his own room, Sirius had to wonder what he was thinking, too--to have said it aloud. Still, he got what he wanted, even if he couldn't say exactly what it was that he did want. Remus within eye sight? Confirmation that Remus absolutely, positively wasn't still angry? Something more? It wouldn't do to think of that.
Sirius huffed at himself and tossed down the magazine. He turned out the light, pulled his shirt off over his head, and curled up on his side next to Remus. He didn't touch him but only just laid there for a long time until he felt sure that Remus was asleep. And then, when he couldn't bear it any longer, he just barely stroked his hand over Remus' hair, touching the curls, and then rested his warm palm on Remus' neck before drawing back and curling his arm beneath his chest as he lay on his stomach.
Almost, he thought. Everything could go back to normal now. They would be friends again, his closest along with James--they would be his family again. Sirius could take care of Remus when he needed it, and Sirius thought that maybe that would be enough, like it had been before. Almost, almost, almost, he thought again, and smiled to himself before he fell asleep.
Anyway.
Title: These Four Kings (Summer 2/2 part a [I'll probably repost this all together and link to a community if you'd rather wait to read.])
Author: Dani (
escribo)Word count: the whole thing is 8000+, this part about 2500+
Rating: PG-13
Pairings: Lily/James (in the future will be Remus/Sirius)
Timeline: August 1977
Disclaimer: All Harry Potter characters are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No copyright infringement is intended. I've not made nor seek any profit.
Year 1: one/ two/ three/ four/ five/ six/ seven
Year 2: one/ two/ three/ four
Year 3: one/ two/three/four
Year 4 (coming in the future when work quits eating my brains! Sorry for the out-of-order-ness)
Year 5 one/ two/ three/ four/ five/ six/ seven/ eight
Year 6 one/ two/ three/ four/ five/ six/ seven/ eight/ nine
Summer one
Remus ducked his head and looked at his shoes as his mother began to cry when Mr. Potter came to collect him. She sat at the kitchen table, a ragged handkerchief clutched in her thin hand as her sister stood over her protectively, treating both Remus and Mr. Potter alternately as if they were invisible or part of a sideshow. He had to resist performing a bit of magic just to needle her that much more, though his wand was locked up tight in his school trunk at his mother's insistence. She hadn't wanted him to go amongst them, as she said, but Remus was determined. He pressed a kiss to her papery cheek, shouldered his bag, and followed Mr. Potter out into the overgrown garden. Before the pull of apparation took him, his last sight of the house was of his aunt and his mother standing at the door, his aunt's expression grim and his mother's frightened.
Remus stumbled as they landed in the field near the Potter's house, James' father catching him, steadying him with a hand to his elbow. Remus hated doing side along apparitions but had been afraid he'd splinch something if he tried it on his own. He hadn't dared it since he'd earned his license in May and he worried about the distance to James' house near Godric's Hollow, fretted that he wouldn't have the strength. Mr. Potter stood quietly at his side, seemingly mesmerized by a flock of starlings that rose up from the field and swooped low and around. He waited until Remus resettled the bag he carried on his shoulder and leaned a little less heavily on his cane. Only then did Mr. Potter smile and gently clap Remus on his back.
"All right, Remus?"
"Yeah, all right. Thank you, Mr. Potter, for--for coming to get me and all."
"My pleasure. The boys have talked about little else except your coming. They're likely still in bed, now, which is lucky for us. We'll be able to have a bite to eat before they clear the cupboards."
Remus followed Mr. Potter around to the back of the rambling house. He hadn't been since the summer before his father died when he'd come to stay for a week right after the summer holidays had started. Back then, Sirius' mother wouldn't let him come and it had just been James and Peter. This time they would all be together, though Peter couldn't come until the end of the week. Remus was nervous about the visit, about seeing James and Sirius again after everything, though he'd been relieved when the letters began to fly between them again, everything seeming to be back to normal.
Of course, James rarely owled unless he was issuing an edict, as he said, about plots and plans for when Remus would come and for the upcoming school year. Sirius, however, had become a constant and faithful correspondent, his letters reminding Remus so much of the times they'd spent together before everything had gone wrong that Remus found himself homesick for Sirius, and, strangely, his father, who had been a great letter writer as well. Remus had reread all of his father's letters and then began placing Sirius' alongside them in the small, rough hewed box he kept hidden in his school trunk so that his mother or aunt wouldn't find and destroy them. He couldn't bear the thought of either of them reading the words that meant so much to him, even though they didn't contain secrets or any great wisdom. Even just knowing what they brought, his mother hated seeing the owls, and would sigh and fret when she caught Remus tucking crusts of bread or bits of bacon into his pocket to give as treats. Remus, however, couldn't help the swoop of pleasure he felt in his stomach each time he saw Sirius' scruffy long eared owl tapping at his window, as different as he could manage from the stately eagle owls Mrs. Black forced Sirius to use when he'd been a boy.
The last letter Sirius had sent was tucked away unanswered in Remus' bag. Since their visit at the beginning of the summer, there'd been no mention of the things that had happened between them and Sirius had never again asked forgiveness--seeming to finally understand that he didn't need to, and Remus' thoughts had slowly found their homecoming in the things that had occupied him before. As he walked alongside Mr. Potter, Remus touched the mangled tin knight that he wore on a cord around his neck. He'd never asked Sirius why he took it, why he had worn it, or why he had given it back--what his sacrifice had really meant. He wondered if Sirius still thought about the kiss they'd shared, if he'd done it right, if they might do it again one day. He wanted to know if James knew, or Peter. He wanted to tell Sirius about Colin Edwards, and how it hadn't been the same as it had been with Sirius--that Colin seemed to be giving his best impression of a fish when he kiss. He wanted to ask Sirius if it felt like that when he'd kissed the girls he'd dated. He wanted so much that he didn't know where to begin and was afraid that he'd muck it up if he tried.
Those thoughts scattered when they found Mrs. Potter in the kitchen, and she rushed to hug and kiss him, rubbing at the smear of lipstick she left on his cheek. She held him out then with her hands on his shoulders, looking frankly at the barely healed scratches that still marred his face. They had long known about his lycanthropy, Remus' father trusting them with the secret prior to the first visit Remus ever made to Godric's Hollow, though Remus hadn't known until years later. He was glad for that now, and he didn't feel pitied by Mrs. Potter's regard when she cupped his face, and asked, "How are you feeling, dear?"
"Better, thank you, Mrs. Potter."
"I've told the boys that they're not to run helter skelter--" Her words were cut off by the sound of James thundering down the back stairs, jumping the last three to land in the kitchen. "James Potter! How many times have I told you to walk down those stairs?"
James flashed a toothy grin at his mother before he spotted Remus and gave a whoop of joy. "You're here early!"
James and his mother were both laughing by the time James knocked into Remus and hugged him tight. Remus couldn't help but smile and hug him back. He'd miss this, how carefree James was, how open. It shocked him how much he missed it, and he had to turn his face away before James saw it there.
"Dad said he wouldn't go until this afternoon."
"Now, we talked about this James," Mrs. Potter started but James interrupted her again.
"He's fine, mum. Tell mum you're fine," James said, still grinning but his hands had gone gentle as he eased Remus into a chair, bending to plant a kiss on the top of his head.
"I'm fine, Mrs. Potter. Really!" Remus promised dutifully in his best prefect's voice--the one that always got them out of trouble.
"See? I'm going to wake up Sirius. He'll be mad that he wasn't down first." With that, James grabbed Remus' bag where he'd dropped it on the floor and was off with a pop of apparition. A second later, they could hear him at the top of the stairs bellowing for Sirius and his mother sighed and laughed, shaking her head.
"Those boys," she said fondly as she buzzed around the kitchen, preparing breakfast. "You'll have to talk with them again Harold. I told them last week that Mrs. Lupin was worried they'd be too rowdy."
"It's really all right, Mrs. Potter. I like it. It's too quiet at my house," Remus said, and Mrs. Potter patted his shoulder.
"I'm surprised they're even up, what with working on the bike till all hours of the night. Sirius is determined to make it fly." Mr. Potter sat at the head of the breakfast table and smiled proudly though he was quick to frown seconds before Mrs. Potter turned to set a plate towering with pancakes onto the table.
"Don't you encourage him, Harold Potter. He'll break his neck."
"It's good for the boys, though they haven't even begun to work out all the charms they'd need. Not for lack of trying, of course." Mr. Potter looked suspiciously proud again, and Mrs. Potter swatted at him with her towel before she waved her wand to bring more bowls and pitchers to the table and began to pour coffee for both James' father and Remus.
Above their chatter and play fighting, Remus could hear James and another, softer foot fall on the stairs and knew it was Sirius. Remus concentrated on his coffee, adding milk and sugar, not quite ready to see him. Try as he might, though, he couldn't help glancing up as they came into the kitchen. James was dressed now and Sirius was trailing behind him, not quite awake but quick enough to nudge James away when he would sit next to Remus, taking the chair for himself. Remus ducked his head again, hiding his smile and taking extra care not tap his spoon against the edges of his cup as he stirred his coffee. Next to him, Sirius was pouring his own cup, his leg jiggling in a familiar nervous gesture, and Remus reached beneath the table to put his hand on Sirius' knee to stop it, also so familiar. Remus thought he must have done that a thousand times when they sat alongside each other in the Great Hall, though never in the last few months.
Sirius went still beneath his hand for a moment before he gave Remus a sidelong look, his eyes suddenly bright beneath his fringe, and smiled. Remus felt that light, swoopy feeling again, like making a spectacular dive on a broom, and smiled back.
Sirius could tell that Remus wasn't really asleep, just mostly, having long ago lost interest as James talked endlessly about Lily and Quidditch, once even wondering aloud if they thought that Lily would join the Quidditch team. Remus had laughed then, his eyes closed, and the smile hadn't left his lips as he lay still and quiet, curled around Sirius' pillow. Sirius sat next to him on the bed, with his back against the headboard and his long legs stretched out so that his hip brushed Remus' arm and his ankle touched Remus' knee. He couldn't stop looking at Remus through his long lashes as he pretended to read a magazine. He kept thinking about how his pillow was going to smell like Remus, and how nice Remus looked since he let his hair grow long enough that it was curling over his ears and at the nape of his neck.
Finally, James stood to go to his own room, stretching and yawning before he flicked his wand to turn off Sirius' record player. He stood for a minute with his hands on his hips, looking at Sirius but Sirius just flipped another page.
"Should we wake him, do you think?" James asked, lightly kicking the foot of the bed.
"Just leave him," Sirius whispered, trying hard to look as though he hadn't planned this all since after breakfast that morning when the Potters had put Remus in the guest room down from where James and Sirius' rooms were. Sirius had said nothing then but perched on the desk with his feet on the chair, watching as Remus carefully refolded and put away his clothes. There were two single beds, Peter would sleep in the other when he came at the end of the week. After a bit Sirius had said, you could have my room and then wondered why he'd said it aloud when Remus and James both turned to look at him as if he'd gone mad. The guest room was fine, a perfectly serviceable room. It had its own bath when Sirius had to share with James and his 101 potions to control his ridiculous hair. The room was fine, and yet Remus continued to stare at him, waiting for some explanation for this lunacy, Sirius was sure. None had been forthcoming. Sirius had only just shrugged his shoulders and looked away as James closed one eye and smooshed his mouth to the side to look at Sirius with what was his "suspicious" face.
Now, with James finally in his own room, Sirius had to wonder what he was thinking, too--to have said it aloud. Still, he got what he wanted, even if he couldn't say exactly what it was that he did want. Remus within eye sight? Confirmation that Remus absolutely, positively wasn't still angry? Something more? It wouldn't do to think of that.
Sirius huffed at himself and tossed down the magazine. He turned out the light, pulled his shirt off over his head, and curled up on his side next to Remus. He didn't touch him but only just laid there for a long time until he felt sure that Remus was asleep. And then, when he couldn't bear it any longer, he just barely stroked his hand over Remus' hair, touching the curls, and then rested his warm palm on Remus' neck before drawing back and curling his arm beneath his chest as he lay on his stomach.
Almost, he thought. Everything could go back to normal now. They would be friends again, his closest along with James--they would be his family again. Sirius could take care of Remus when he needed it, and Sirius thought that maybe that would be enough, like it had been before. Almost, almost, almost, he thought again, and smiled to himself before he fell asleep.
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I love swoopy-stomached Remus, and sweet scheming Sirius - as if Remus hadn't intentionally fallen asleep there, as if he needs to give Remus such practical reasons to stay around.
I think I'm gonna have a stab at drawing smooshed-face James today...
>:-* <--lolol
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:D
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Again, THESE TWO. :D I love huffy uncertain but actually pretty damn certain Sirius. He's perfect. And oh, Remus, resign yourself to your fate. :D
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Continuing on!!